My girl's a vegetable

Melody: 

My Gal's a Corker

Lyrics: 

She's got a new TV
It's called an ECG
I'd do most anything to keep her alive

Chorus:
My girl's a vegetable
She lives in a hospital
I'd do most anythin

Her ECG does not rise
Still she can part her thighs
I'd do most anything to keep her alive

She has no arms or legs
Just hooks and wooden pegs
I'd do most anything to keep her alive

She has no feet or hands
Her head's held on by rubber bands
I'd do most anything to keep her alive

She's got a tracheotomy
She can breathe while giving head to me
I'd do most anything to keep her alive

She cannot hear, she cannot see
But she's got an oral cavity
I'd do most anything to keep her alive

She can't get out of bed
Still she can give me head
I'd do most anything to keep her alive

She might not live out the night
So she won't put up a fight
I'd do most anything to keep her alive

She's had an episiotomy
That's a bigger hole for me
I'd do most anything to keep her alive

My girl has leprosy
Bits and pieces land all over me
I'd do most anything to keep her alive

I'm always guaranteed a blow
Because she cannot say no
I'd do most anything to keep her alive

My girl has long blonde hair
It's in patches here and there
I'd do most anything to keep her alive

There's one doctor I won't let in
That's Dr. Kevorkian
I'd do most anything to keep her alive